For the purpose of confidentiality as this involves a young person, the names of the people involved will not be published. Throughout this story, they will be referred to as mother (mom) and daughter (child).
“Attention neighbors,” a sign says on the front door of Mom’s place. “A child with mental health needs lives here; you may hear screaming or banging at any time of day. Please be understanding. We thank you.”
If you step into this home, you will find lock boxes screwed to the walls where sharp objects are securely stored, and knives are locked away. But most importantly, you will find a very loving and devoted mom who has been doing everything she can to create a safe and stable environment for her child.
“My daughter started running away when she was only nine years old,” the mother explained. “It got to a point when it was not manageable, and she was living outside of my home for nine months.”
During those nine months with her child in a group home, mom worked on herself. She found resources and services that could help her heal and become the mother she wanted to be and the mother her child needed during difficult times.
“OPS made it manageable,” she said. “They never made me feel like a bad mother, never made me feel like they were judging us.”
The type of calls officers would respond to regarding her child were uncommon: a nine-year-old running away with weapons, talking of committing suicide and reacting aggressively to officers. “They called in paramedics once because she smashed her head on the glass partition in the cruiser,” mom explained. “There was so much explaining to do about her needs, her struggles and why she does this, but OPS always listened, and those conversations led to a good outcome.”
Her child has not run away in months, now.
The mother explained that when in crisis, her daughter would attract a lot of attention and looks from passersby and people in their community. She is grateful that OPS never treated her daughter like she was a bad kid. “They are so patient with her,” she said. “They give her space to express her frustration and then calmly work on de-escalation. They ask me what works at home and even try new things they think might help.”
Mom explained that it is always the same officers who respond in her area, and they became comfortable and familiar with her story. “It got to a point where once my child was safe and officers found her, I could go back home and wait for them to bring her back.” During that time, officers used the tools and training they have to connect with the female and talk with her, deescalate the situation and bring her back to her mother calm and regulated.
At times when her child was in crisis and had run away, mom said as soon as OPS would get involved, she felt relief. “Just knowing that they care and they are trying to help, they are out there looking for her, they know her and our family and how to deal with her needs.” Mom said officers have empowered her through some of the hardest times. “Officers would remind me that every single time they respond, I am always there for my daughter, I do everything I can and that I am strong for that.”
Of all the different organizations and services she has worked with to answer to her child’s needs, mom said that OPS officers are the first to ask how she is doing. “They know I am working with every service for my daughter, but then they ask what I have in place for myself, making sure that I am ok and supported as well.”
Mom worked with local police to set up an information notice that comes up on the police search engine whenever you input her name or date of birth. “I never felt understood properly out in the community and in our systems. There is a pain point with my daughter and a reason why she does this. OPS used their tools and made it effortless because everyone knew who she was and what her situation was, and if a new officer didn’t, it was all in their system.”
While in crisis, mom explained that her child is looking for safety, and officers can provide that. “She always loved law enforcement,” mom said. “I believe OPS got new cruisers, because let me tell you this little girl knows every detail of the new cruisers.”
If other parents have children or youth struggling with their mental health to a point where they require an OPS response, mom wants parents to know that they are here to help and the best thing you can do is be honest about your situation. “Don’t be afraid to reach out to OPS if you need to. You are not alone.”
For more resources and information on youth mental health, visit the mental health section of our website. You can also visit the website or call the Kids Help Phone.
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