Summer has come to an end and families are now focused on the upcoming school year. Our children may experience some anxiety as the new school year approaches. They will encounter new teachers, new classmates, or maybe a new school. They will make new friends and reconnect with old ones.
While there may be a lot of excitement, they may face challenges they have never experienced before and it can be a very unsettling time for them. Establishing healthy relationships and learning effective conflict resolution is vital for a productive school year and it is never too early to teach our children how to speak up or advocate for themselves. (Advocacy is taking responsibility for communicating one’s needs and desires in a straightforward manner.)
Communicating your needs and wishes can be unsettling and listening to the opinions of others, especially when their opinions differ from yours, can be a real challenge. Like many other important life skills, self-advocacy is a critical tool our children need in order to achieve goals in their lives. Self-sufficiency develops self-respect and helps to become a healthy, productive young adult. It is a lifelong process that begins with them learning by watching you, as a parent, be a good advocate and a parent can be their best advocate when needed.
Parents can teach their children to be good advocates by: Being a good role model and talking about your own feelings without expressing anger or violence. Use positive problem-solving skills.
Encourage your child’s talents and skills, while also accepting their limitations. Celebrate your child’s accomplishments. Give your child opportunities to learn and grow, including being involved in their school and community with other caring adults and friends.
Set clear expectations and be consistent and fair with consequences for misbehavior. Make sure to acknowledge both positive and negative behaviors. Take the initiative to help your children if you notice they are struggling with life.
Children may need extra support at times. If there is concern that your child may be experiencing a mental health problem, it is important for parents to immediately seek help from a doctor or licensed mental health professional.
Caring for your child’s mental health is just as vital as caring for their physical health. Pay attention to warning signs, and if you’re concerned there might be a problem, seek professional help. Let your child know that everyone experiences pain, fear, sadness, worry and anger, and that these emotions are normal. Warning signs should be taken seriously. Consider consulting a professional if your child:
- Feels very sad or hopeless
- Feels overly anxious, scared, or worried.
- Feels irritable or is excessively angry.
- Begins using drugs/alcohol
- Wants to be alone all of the time or talks about suicide or death or hurting other people, or animals.
- Has major changes in eating or sleep habits
- Loses interest in friends or things usually enjoyed.
- Grades have declined
Life can become overwhelming at times for our children, just as it can for us. Caring, loving support can save a young life and help children to live healthy, happy lives.
Betty Nufer is a community advocate and cheerleader for those who need support getting through the rough times in life. She can be reached at [email protected].
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